Potty Training Tips For Stubborn Children That Work!

"Plop. Plop. Fizz. Fizz. Oh, what a relief it is."

--Old Potty Training Song

Many moms are not experiencing relief when their stubborn child resists potty
training all together. With the laundry piling up and the cost of pull-ups
eating away at the weekly budget, it's no wonder many parents feel like they're
ready to flush those unsuccessful potty training techniques down the toilet! I
receive at least one email a week from a mom in the parenting "deep end" asking
for suggestions in this area.

Child-Tested Potty Training Tips for Stubborn Children

Here are my top seven tips for potty training stubborn children:

1. Know that Your Child WILL be Potty Trained - Potty training is one of
the most important skills preschoolers will learn. They do learn it--it's just
that some children are slower than others. Everyone eventually learns how to go
to the bathroom on their own. Have faith! It's just a matter of time.

2. Stay Away from Cute, External Rewards - The more you make potty
training into a game, the more your child will see it as a game. Chances are
they might turn into a competitive battle where you lose. Cute ideas (like
sticker charts for when children "go", floating Cheerios into the bowl and
having boys aim for it, putting food coloring into the bowl and having your
child get excited about watching the color change) only confuses the
issue--especially when the gimmicks lose their appeal. The rewards of potty
training should be internal: your child should feel good about herself for
learning something new. By all means, encourage you child when he remembers with
a simple, "Great job!". This is all that is needed for success.

3. Stick with Your Decision to Forgo diapers and Pull-ups - My belief is
that pull-ups that soak up the uncomfortable wet feeling actually prolong potty
training. One of the children in my life became so comfortable with pull-ups
that he was wearing them well into the school years for night accidents.
Accidents (many of them) will happen. When kids aren't given the opportunity to
continually experience the natural discomfort that comes from wet clothes, they
have no reason to learn to make potty training a priority. Consider putting a
protective waterproof sheet around their mattress, but stay away from soaker
pads and pull-ups once you have made the shift (and the sooner, the better).

4. Make Potty Training Comfortable - A big person toilet for a small bum
can be a scary thing. Use training potties, potty seats, or have your child face
the toilet when sitting on the throne so they can sit comfortably.

5. Let Go of Constant Reminders and Prodding - The more you make it a big
deal, the more your child will fight you. If you are taking all the
responsibility for your child to remember to go, there will be no incentive or
reason for them to remember. When it comes to potty training, the best reminder
comes from your child's own bladder--not you! And when your child forgets or
doesn't listen to their bladder, the pee running down their leg is their next
reminder.

6. Have Your Child Help Clean Up When Accidents Happen - Accidents happen
and are a part of the natural process of potty training. Don't make a big deal
out of accidents. Instead deal with the accident by happily cleaning it up
together. Have your child help you find dry clothes and deal with washing up.

7. Give Your Child More Responsibilities Around the House - The more
confidence your child feels, the more they will embrace learning any new skill
(including potty training). Look for tasks that your preschooler can be
responsible for and thank her for what she does. Involving your child in the
upkeep of your home is one of the best things you can do for him (see chapter
eight of my book When You're About To Go Off The Deep End, Don't Take Your
Kids With You to learn more about how chores can boost your child's
self-esteem).

Potty training is one of the many skills your child needs to perfect. When you
support your child in listening to the natural cues of their own body, you will
empower him or her with life-long skills. And if you choose to use the above
seven potty training tips for a stubborn child, you'll find that potty training
becomes a process--rather than a power struggle--with a happy ending.

Kelly Nault, MA author of When You’re About To Go Off The Deep End, Don’t Take Your Kids With You inspires moms to put themselves first—for the sake of their children. She shares time-tested tools that motivate children to want to be well behaved, responsible and happy! Sign up for her free online parenting course here. You are free to print or publish this article provided the article and bio remain as written and include a link to http://www.mommymoments.com as above.

© 2005 UltimateParent.com. All rights reserved

Potty Training Tips For Girls

Parenting Question

"My older daughter turns 4 in a few days and still has very little interest
in potty training. Initially, I was waiting for her to lead the way by showing
interest. Her sister was born when she was 27 months old, and I didn't feel that
either immediately before or after the birth was a good time for either of us to
start potty training. Time dragged on, until I started finding myself getting
angry about changing her dirty diapers just after she turned 3. One day, I
decided it was time for her to start using the toilet. The first few mornings,
she threw a tantrum about wanting a diaper, but then she accepted wearing
underpants. I made up a chart and let her put stickers on it for going in the
toilet. There was some success, but as time went by, the success rate declined.
She became more and more resistant to reminders to go to the toilet.

Earlier this year, our family decided to move house, and I could see this was
causing my daughter some stress. After talking to other moms, I decided to
remove the potty pressure--so I asked my daughter whether she would like to wear
diapers or underpants. For a while, she chose to go back to diapers. After three
weeks, she asked to go back to underpants. I tried be neutral about her
decisions and to keep my input low-key and supportive. My husband and I praised
her verbally when she succeeded. But the same thing happened.

I know my daughter is very bright, strong-willed, and likes to push my buttons.
She is also very sensitive and cautious. She is genuinely afraid of sitting on
toilets without a child's potty-seat on top, but we don't make her do that if
she doesn't want to. We either take her potty-seat with us to friends' houses,
or allow her to choose to wear pull-ups when we go out. Occasionally, we have
gotten so frustrated that we have coerced her (for example, no lunch until you
sit on the potty)--despite knowing that negativity should never be part of the
potty training process.

I did some research and found that the only way of eliminating resistance is to
eliminate whatever your child is resisting against. So I've tried being
completely neutral about the whole thing and to show no negative reaction to
'accidents'. Maybe I haven't tried long enough, but the accidents just seem to
go on and on. Eventually, I can't start showing disapproval and getting angry
again. This week, she is back in diapers because I am so tired of dealing with
the wet and dirty clothes (to be honest, the seemingly pointless resistance bugs
me much more than the laundry). Obviously, my behavior is enabling hers and
together we are creating this cycle, but I don't know how to change it. Help!"--Mom
Seeking Potty Training Tips for Girls

Positive Parenting Tip For Potty Training Girls

Dear Mom Seeking Potty Training Tips for Girls:

Phew! I am tired from just reading about your experience, so I can imagine how
frustrated you must be! The good news is that potty training tips for girls are
essentially no different from potty training tips for boys.

Firstly, good for you for doing some research on resistance. I do believe your
daughter is resisting--but not what you think she's resisting. She's actually
resisting growing up. You've brought a new baby into the home and, to an oldest
child who used to be the only child, this can be traumatic. Your daughter is
faced with the fact that she is no longer the baby. When this happens
(especially when you have two children close in age and of the same sex), the
oldest child may:

o Find a way to continue to act like the baby of the family by wearing diapers.

o Look for ways to keep you and your husband busy with her (and not her sister),
including the sticker chart and the back-and-forth resistance you are
experiencing with potty training. Negative attention is better than none at all.

Effective Potty Training Tips for Girls Who Resist

Consistently use these five effective potty training tips for girls who are
resisting and your potty training situation will turn around relatively quickly.
Be patient and plan for things to take some time (especially during the first
couple of weeks).

1. Have Faith that She WILL Learn - No matter how resistant your daughter
is to potty training, she will learn (everyone does). Potty training is one of
the key skills preschoolers need to learn, and they do learn it--be patient and
know that some learn slower than others.

2. Stick with Your Decision to Forgo Pull-ups and Diapers - As you know,
accidents (many of them) will happen. But when kids aren't given the opportunity
to experience the natural discomfort that comes with wet clothes--by using
pull-ups that soak it all up--this can prolong the time it takes for potty
training.

3. Stay Away from External Reward Systems - You don't need stickers to
reward your daughter for her success. The rewards of potty training should be
the internal rewards she experiences from feeling good about learning a new
skill that comes with growing up. Continue to encourage her when she remembers
to go to the washroom.

4. Get Her to Help Clean Up When Accidents Happen - Continue to not make
a big deal out of accidents. Let go of the many external reminders (verbal and
visual) all together. The next time she has an accident, have her help you do
the washing and thank her for it. Be consistent with this and allow her to learn
from the experience of wet pants.

5. Give Your Daughter More Responsibilities Around the House - The more
your daughter can do around the house to help, the more she'll feel good about
her position as "big sister". Look for ways for her to help you with the baby
and ways for her to help you out with the housework. Then thank her! Give her
the opportunity to pass on what she learns to her "little sister" and your
situation will improve even more. All this can go far in boosting her sense of
contribution, responsibility and her desire to grow up.

I also suggest finding a way to let go of your own anger around the potting
training issue. It appears you have a very strong-willed daughter on your hands
who is pushing back. The more anger you feel (even when not outwardly
expressed), the more she will resist and push back. Unfortunately, parents who
get into this type of emotional tug-of-war lose! If you start to see her
accidents as quality time you can have together doing laundry, you might feel a
shift. I would also highly recommend reading Chapter 7 ("Secret to Solving
Sibling Rivalry Once And For All") of my book When You're About to Go Off the
Deep End, Don't Take Your Kids with You, so you can quickly nip any other
future sibling-related issues in the bud.

Kelly Nault, MA author of When You’re About To Go Off The Deep End, Don’t Take Your Kids With You inspires moms to put themselves first—for the sake of their children. She shares time-tested tools that motivate children to want to be well behaved, responsible and happy! Sign up for her free online parenting course here.

You are free to print or publish this article provided the article and bio remain as written and include a link to http://www.mommymoments.com as above.

© 2005 UltimateParent.com - All rights reserved.

Potty Training Your Toddler

The days of dirty diapers are almost over! Or at least within sight, you hope. But now the real task begins and that's potty training. Before you even contemplate potty training your toddler, first figure out if they show signs that they are ready.

Is Your Child Ready?

If you can answer yes to one or more of these questions, than your child may be ready to begin potty training.

o Does your child dislike having a dirty diaper on? Many toddlers start taking their dirty diapers off themselves to show their dislike.

o Does your child let you know in some way that they have to go to the bathroom or do they let you know while they are going? This shows you that your child is able to recognize to some degree when they have to go to the bathroom.

o Does your child show interest in the potty? They want to sit on it, maybe even without a diaper.

o Does your child have a dry diaper after their nap or a dry diaper after an hour and a half? This shows you that your child has the physical maturity to hold his urine for an extended period of time.

Potty Training Tips

o Take your child to the bathroom with you. Children learn by example. Dads and brothers can show the little boys how it is done and moms and sisters can show the little girls how to go to the potty.

o Find a potty that works best for your child. Some children prefer using the little potty chair while others want to use the big potty with a potty seat insert. You can even try purchasing one of those potties that play music or change colors if you think it would work best for your child.

o You can make a reward chart and let your child put a sticker on it each time they go to the potty. This works with some children but not others.

o Have your child start wearing underwear around the house instead of training diapers. Most children will just go to the bathroom in their training diaper as if it were a regular diaper. When they go to the bathroom in their underwear, this is a different sensation all together. Try buying some fun underwear with characters your child likes.

o There are many children's books out there that teach children about going to the potty. Try reading some of these books to your child.

o Be sure and praise your child for going to the potty or even if they attempt to go.

Don't Despair

Don't worry if your child doesn't pick up potty training right away. All children are different and what works for one doesn't always work for the other. Some children will urinate in the potty pretty easily but are afraid to defecate in the potty. If this is the case with your child, you may have to put a diaper on them if they have to defecate and continue to let them urinate in the potty. Reassure them that it is okay and they will eventually come around.

If your child cries and shows a lot of anxiety over potty training then stop and try it in a few months. And never show anger and disappointment when accidents happen and many will happen. Children don't always potty train when we want them to but instead when they are ready.

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5 Tips to Potty Training Your Child

Potty training a child is one of the most exciting milestones of a young parent's life. I have potty trained three children, both boys and girls and they have all potty trained in different ways. Each child has their own unique personality and learning style so it was interesting to me as a Mom to watch them all pass through this milestone in their development.

As you begin to think about potty training your child, the first thing to remember is, don't get stressed out. They will not be wearing diapers to kindergarten. With that being said, here a re a few practical tips that will get you and your child started on the right foot.

Step 1 - Don't wait too long. Get them used to the idea of the "potty" early. Keep a small potty on the floor in the bathroom that they can sit on before and after baths or whenever you are using the bathroom. They may be completely clothed, but the simple act of sitting down on the potty gets them used to the idea early on. Our first child was not comfortable at first sitting up high on the traditional potty, so the small stable seat on the ground gave him the security he required. They will be observing your own bathroom habits as well. You will notice their curiosity kick in quit young. I think our first was saying "potty" at 1 although he didn't begin training until his 2nd birthday.

Step 2 - Your child is smart. Don't underestimate what your child can comprehend. They are learning new skills and new words and an astonishing rate. They are able to understand the concept. They may not have the muscle control for some time, but they have the cognitive ability to understand what is happening with the potty. Give them some visual clues. Show them what goes in to the potty and give the opportunity to flush afterwards. At times, I would even put the contents of their "dirty" diaper into the potty to show them where it goes. These are all important clues that are helping their brain assimilate information that will help them be successful in their training.

Step 3 - Stay in Control. We call this "potty training" because they are training for something. They are working on learning a new skill, not waiting until they have the skill perfectly accomplished before the undertake it. Parents and children can get a little lazy or busy and forget what needs to be happening. In our family we set up a little system to help us remember to use the potty. With 3 young children and home schooling, we all get busy and forget the task at hand, so I use the timer method. I would set the timer at different intervals to remind us when to use the potty. That and I would make sure to give them enough water throughout the day to give the opportunity to practice. The first day of training I did about 15 minute intervals to get used to the idea of pulling up and down their pants, getting on the potty and the muscle memory needed to go when needed, as a voluntary response and not an involuntary response. The second day we increased the time and the third day a bit more time was added. We still had accidents, but tons of underwear sitting on the back of the toilet helped us move through the accidents with ease.

Step 4 - Be consistent. Once you have decided to start. Don't stop when it may be hard, or it is taking your child longer than all of the little stories you hear form friends or on the internet. Some kid's potty train in a day, or three days or some take months of reminding and practice just because of their particular makeup. Keep up with the training of skills, like, how to pull their pants on and off, change themselves, wash their hands and get on the potty themselves. You will see that consistency pays off in the end. I would carry a travel potty in the car with me, so that we could quickly use the potty when we were at stores or traveling, so we didn't have to visit a dirty bathroom that was unfamiliar. That helped us stay consistent and flexible at the same time.

Step 5- Give it time Our first child potty trained in a week both 1 and 2, our second child (a girl, potty trained in a day on 1 and then 6 weeks later on 2 and our third child has taken a couple of weeks. This is partly because he is a boy and partly because he is the third. Never the less, they are all well adjusted potty trained kids. I have found the process of potty training, is one of teaching a parent how to be patient and teaching a child how to be independent. Isn't that a metaphor for all of parenting? Most of all, enjoy the process, it won't be long before they are asking for the car keys and these will be found memories you look back and cherish.

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Potty Training My Toddler

How To Potty Train a Toddler. Top 5 ways of knowing if your child is ready for that big step. One of the most frightening things about being a new parent is figuring out when a child is ready for the "next stage in life". When are they ready to stop drinking from a bottle, or when should they attempt to feed themselves or when should a parent start potty training? These changes were quite frightening for me because as I read many expert opinions about the subject and the consequences associated with doing something wrong, you have no choice but to be scared of messing up so bad that your child will have to deal with the consequences forever.

I'm here to tell you to relax. The wonderful thing about most of these stages, they are part of nature and most of the time nature will prevail despite our short falls. The best advice for new parents is to follow the signs that nature provide.

The top 5 signs that signal you that your child maybe ready for potty training are as follows:

1) Your child stay dry for longer period of time
2) Your child wakes up dry often in the morning
3) Your child starts dressing herself/himself
4) Your child let you know they need changing or if they are wet
5) Your child show interest in wearing big kids underpants

These signs tell you that this is a great time to make an attempt at potty training. Now it is important to remember in all the different stages in your child's life, the most important ways to influence change is through consistency and serving as the role model.

When beginning to potty train my daughter, I first took her to the store to select the "Big Girl" underpants to serve as her motivation. I selected to begin this process at a time when I was home on leave from work with her and when we would have very little distractions from our schedule.

The next day, I introduced her to the potty. We started our day on the potty. During that day, every time I went, my daughter sat on the potty. The second day, I put on the Big girl underpants on her for an hour and I move the potty to the family room where we spend most of our day. Every 30 minutes I would have her sit on the potty. This would go on for several days, until she finally goes on her own. I celebrated with her, but not excessively. I wanted her to know that this was a great thing but also a normal part of life.

Like I mentioned before, relax if your child resist at first. Eventually, your child will come around. You will not have an 18 year old in diapers. It will happen in due time. Be patient, relax, stay consistent and motivated.

Michela Victor is a mother of 2, an entrepreneur and a health consultant.

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Potty Training Boys Isn't As Scary As You Think

In some respects, it doesn't make too much of a difference whether you are in the process of potty training boys or girls. With that said, there are a few differences and there are some things that you can do to help make teaching your son to use the toilet a success.

Just like potty training a girl, your boy needs to be ready to begin the process. You need to be careful about pushing the process on him and starting too early. When he starts asking questions and showing an interest in the toilet, he is probably ready to begin. Seize the opportunity to start putting your potty training plan in place.

One of the key things that parents can do to help in toilet learning is to model potty behavior. Dads, here is where you need to step up to the plate. If the child is curious about how boys go potty, then allow him to observe when you go. Children want to emulate their parents and this kind of role modeling can go a long way towards helping them gain command of the potty. Explain everything that you do as you go along. As well, do this as often as possible. Consistency and routine is important in getting the concepts to stick and become habit.

Using training pants right away can be a big factor leading to potty training success. Training pants feel different than diapers and give them a sense right away of being a big boy. The other advantage to using training pants is that if they have an accident in them, they are a lot less comfortable than they would be wearing a diaper. For many boys, this is enough incentive to help them minimize the amount of accidents they have.

There is a great opportunity when toilet training boys to have a little fun. Throwing a couple of Cheerios into the bowl before they pee helps turn potty time into a bit of fun time. Giggles are guaranteed as they have a little target practice while going pee. Keep a small bag of Cheerios in the bathroom and keep them handy, since sometimes there is not always a lot of time to pre-plan the potty events for the little guy. Also, considering having them color flushable targets to keep near the toilet. Active involvement in the toilet teaching process helps to keep the child motivated and allows them to buy in to the process.

Teaching boys to use the toilet requires just as much patience as it does to potty train girls. There are going to be times that your patience is tested, but it's important to remain calm. You and your boy will get through the little accidents. They are not a big deal. Keep things in perspective and you and your boy will learn to use the toilet.

Sean Platt offers plenty of potty training help, tips, tricks and advice to assist parents in determining the best time to start potty training their children. Visit PottyTrainingPower.com today!

Parenting Tips For Potty Training

Potty training can be a difficult experience for both parent and child. When done correctly, it can be a moment in time that is looked at as a blessing. The child feels like a 'big kid', the parent gets out of buying diapers! But, when rushed, it can be a disaster.

Therefore, before even considering the process, ask yourself these questions:

1. Is this a relatively stress-free time in the family?

Look carefully at your current family situation. Is there extra time? Are activities at the lowest possible point in time? No major changes coming soon? Job stress low? It is important to have the time and patience to successfully get through potty training with a smile on your face. So, if you have big projects at work or the distant relative is coming to stay with you for awhile, now may not be the greatest of times to get started. However, if everything is running smoothly, it may be the perfect time to begin.

2. Is your child ready?

It use to be that a child was pushed to be potty trained at the age of one. Those days are long gone, thank goodness. By nature, a child starts to become interested around the age of two. However, each child is different and the final decision as to when to try and use the potty is strictly between the parent and child.
When a child is ready, they will start to show signs.

Signs of readiness:

· Child wanting to wear 'big kid' underwear

· Keeping their diaper dry for 2 hours

· Having predictable bowel movements

· Telling you when they have to go

· Uncomfortable wearing diapers

· Able to pull their own pants up and down

If they show the above signs, it might just be time to give it a shot.

Ready?

· Take your child to the store and let them pick out their own potty chair.

· Encourage them to decorate it with stickers and drawings to make it feel more like their own.

· Start by just letting them sit on it whenever they want, for whatever reason. They may want to read a book while sitting on their potty; they may also want to use the potty with their diaper on. Just sitting on it will help them be more comfortable.

· Make "potty time" a routine. Set specific times your child sits on the potty for a few minutes, whether or not they actually use it doesn't matter.

· At other then the designated times, if they show signs of need, rush them to the potty chair and reward them if they successfully used the chair.

· Try NOT to get mad when they have an accident. This process takes time and practice and the children should be rewarded for successes. Not punished for failures.

· When your child does a "poo-poo" in their diapers, help them take it to the potty chair. That will quietly tell them where the "poo-poo" goes.

After several weeks of success, it may be time to ditch the diapers. Make this a big event. Let the child throw them away and let them know they are now a "big" boy or girl. This is a moment to be celebrated and remember. Maybe bake a cake and take pictures.

If your child is still in need of night time cover, buy special pull-ups or night time trainers. They look and feel more like underwear and your child will not feel like they failed at night due to accidents. Don't even call them diapers. They are simply "Night Trainers." It is perfectly normal for the nights to take a little longer for the child to gain control over.

This can be a long and difficult process, but it is a huge part of growing up. Some children take longer than others. Try not to worry and do not to let anyone comment on the length of training. Keep in mind that this is equally as stressful for your child as it is for you.

Children grow up so fast and unless unusual circumstances exist, there are no children walking down the aisle to graduate high school wearing diapers! So, relax! All things will come in time, including potty training.

Chris Lowrey

Author and Editor of Family Time Charm

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Ten Tips For Potty Training Success

Embarking on the potty training mission is one of the milestones of parenting. Parents are anxious to be proud of their children and to leave the days of diapers, wipes and diaper bags far behind. Teaching children to use the toilet is not always easy, but here are some tips for potty training that should help you to get your child out of diapers once and for all.

1. Start when the child is showing signs of being ready to start. If they are showing an interest in you when you go potty, it may be time to think about getting started with toilet teaching. Other signs include long periods of dry diapers, questions about going potty, or letting you know when they have pooped or peed their diaper.


2. Remember that no two children are alike. Some will start earlier and others will start later. There is no perfect age to start.


3. Get a calendar and mark the start date for potty training. Keep the calendar where the child can easily see it and enthusiastically build the excitement as the day gets closer.


4. Talk with the child about all the wonderful things that go hand in hand with being potty trained. Relate how cool it will be to be a big boy or girl. Let them know how many more neat things they will be able to do once they no longer are wearing diapers.


5. Have plenty of interesting and fun rewards available. They can be small things, just make sure they are things the child will be happy to receive. You can have them help you shop for these rewards. Keep in mind that some rewards can be things like staying up a little later or being able to watch their favorite movie.


6. For the boys, keep a small bag of something like Cheerios available in the potty. They make fun target practice and can be a great incentive.


7. Remain patient. There will be setbacks and great leaps forward. If you get frustrated they will be able to sense it and this will often lead back to old habits.


8. Most libraries have some great books on potty training. In the days leading up to the start of using the toilet, read these with your child. The books will help to answer questions and they will show your child that all kids learn to use the potty.


9. Model appropriate potty behavior. It's okay for them to come in and watch how it works. This curiosity is a great indicator of their readiness to begin their training. Kids always want to be just like mom or dad.


10. Remain consistent in your training. If the child knows what to expect, they are much more likely to respond in a positive way. Incorporate as much routine as possible. Structure and routine are valuable to children.

It is possible to have a relatively painless toilet teaching experience. These tips should get you going in the right direction.

Sean Platt offers plenty of potty training help, tips, tricks and advice to assist parents in determining the best time to start potty training their children. Visit PottyTrainingPower.com today!

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